Life amidst death: My take on tragedy

Samson+Charles+of+Tanzania+drowned+in+a+tragic+kayaking+accident+on+June+12%2C+2016.

Samson Charles of Tanzania drowned in a tragic kayaking accident on June 12, 2016.

The text just said, “Will.” That’s not the way Branden talks, ever. “Call me. Now.” followed quickly. I excused myself from the group of people I was with and walked outside.
The phone rang once, and Branden picked up. “Hey man,” I said. “Will, it’s Samson,” he said.
Samson was a mutual friend of ours who had come to America from Tanzania to play basketball. It was summer, and his host family, also mutual friends of ours, was out of town on vacation, leaving Samson a house to himself, possibly getting into some mischief.
“What about Samson?” His answer was lost because our cell connection was poor and he cut out. I could barely hear him. “Branden, what happened?” My voice strained because I was panicking.
“He came through my line at work tonight, Samson…” The call cut out, but I thought I heard that the gentle giant was seen intoxicated. “He was drunk?” I asked. “No you don’t understand,” Branden’s voice cracked, “He drowned.”
Instantly, I felt the lead-footed dizziness that comes with unprecedented shock. “Say that one more time,” I pressed, hoping I had just misheard him again. I was pacing now. “Samson is dead.”
Those three words rocked me to the core. I hadn’t known Samson for long, just a few months, but he was the kind of fellow who would make your day better in 30 seconds. He was the kind of person your parents tell you to be like. Samson was just an incredible human being who lived to make other people happy.
This was one of the first times I’d ever had to deal with the death of someone so close to me. It was like a Mike Tyson punch in the gut knowing that I’d never see him again.
Obviously, no death is fun. No one says “I want to experience that level of grief again,” but for me it was more than that. It was a level of hurt I’d never felt and never wanted to feel again. I was hurt that God took my dear friend away from me. I didn’t ever want to feel that again.
Clearly, that feeling is just a pipe dream. There’s no actual way to circumvent death. It’s going to happen, and God’s timing is perfect, whether it seems that way or not. Ultimately, I would have to deal with that grief again, I just wanted God to wait as long as he could, so it didn’t have to happen again.
He sure took his sweet time. Five months and seven days to be exact. I was at lunch; just hanging out.
Dad came up to my table and told me I needed to come with him, make sure I had all my stuff because I would be leaving and likely not coming back to school for the rest of the day.
He told me there was something really serious that he needed to talk to my brothers and I about, but it didn’t involve my mother or baby sister. They were fine.
My brothers were already in the car. I got in, and my dad told us that there had been a very serious car accident in Washington where we used to live.
My dad’s sister had been driving, and they hit a slick spot on the highway, went across the median and were slammed by a semi going the other direction. Her two sons in the vehicle were killed on the scene.
I couldn’t fathom what I was hearing. Two nice young boys, my cousins, Adam just 12, and Alec, 13, were no longer living.
We really weren’t that close. Being 1,300 miles apart makes it a little bit hard to sustain a really quality relationship, but we had grown up nearby. We were at all the same family get togethers. Christmas, Easter, Thanksgiving, you name it, we were there. Years worth of photos tie us together. They had come to visit us here in North Platte last April.
Alec was a bubbly, joyful kid who loved hip hop and was ready to challenge anyone to a rap battle. Adam was a dangerous soccer player and all-around athlete who without a doubt had a bright, bright future.
It is not easy to write about people using past-tense verbs. Samson was. Alec did. Adam had. Knowing that their time was cut much shorter than expected.
That said, I don’t say that Samson, Alec, and Adam were taken too soon. I know that God set those days at a time further back than history goes. I know God is good. I know at times it seems like his plan is failing, but his ways are higher than my ways, and his thoughts are higher than my thoughts.
I can’t know why God set those days to be theirs, and I wish all the time that God had waited a little longer for them. When I feel grief and see the grief of others around me, I just wish that it would have gone differently, but I trust God to know what he’s doing.
Samson, Alec, and Adam were all incredibly joyful people. They spread happiness to people around them, and whoever your Samsons, Alecs, and Adams are, you can find life in their deaths by spreading joy to others like they would.
Grief is natural, and the sadness can be overwhelming sometimes, but there is a peace that can come when you acknowledge that God is working in ways that we can’t always see.